There are many ways to explore and understand our erotic nature.
The four elements of Water, Earth, Air and Fire offer a beautiful perspective through which we can view and understand our eroticism.
You may identify strongly with one of these erotic elements more than the others. You may find that you experience them all at different times. You also might notice your elemental expression shifting depending on who you are with, your emotional or mental state or the different phases of your life.
The water element is a representation of sensual eroticism. It is fluid, soft, emotional and heart-felt. This often shows up as romantic expressions of our desire and sexuality. There is attention given to all the sensations of pleasure, creating ease, enjoyment, relaxation. There is often a preference for ambient, sensual or romantic gestures like candle light, poetry, bubble baths, dinner and sensual massages.
The earth element is a primal, raw and physical expression of our sexuality. This element calls forth our animal nature. Think of animals tumbling around and playing with each other. It is a very embodied expression of our sexuality and can be rough, strong, and/or playful. There is often exchanges of power present through dominance and submission.
The air element is experienced through the intellect, and through imagination and fantasy. Think of the excitement of anticipation, or longing for your beloved after an extended time apart. Or what it is like to be wildly attracted to someone for their mind, the way they think and/or expressive themselves cognitively. This element is active when you experience becoming widely aroused just thinking about a person, imagining an interaction with them, or fantasizing about their touch.
The fire element is passionate and expressive. This might show up as elaborate displays of adoration and devotion. The fire element is also related to Spirit and brings with it a longing for union and Oneness. There is desire to be together with your Beloved or to make love as a way of connecting to God or the Divine.
These elements rarely exist in isolation and often flow into each other. We might desire them all together or crave one more than another at different moments.
The value in understanding eroticism through the lens of the elements is to know yourself more intimately and to understand your lover(s) more clearly. When we have this understanding it easier to have compassion and find a way to meet each other.
It is not uncommon to have different preferences from your partner/lover. When we are willing to understand each other, there is more possibility for co-creative experiences that empower each other to get what we want and to feel fulfilled creating that together.
For example, knowing that your partner really values and responds easily to the qualities of the water element, you might be more inclined to put some extra energy and attention to creating a more sensual experience for them. And if they know that you really get turned on by the primal and powerful expressions of the earth element, they might be more understanding and thus more willingly to freely play and explore with you in a somatic way.
Feel into which if these elements resonate with you. Think of some times in your life when you felt really aroused, or had a super hot lovemaking session or felt strongly attracted to someone. Were any of these qualities more present than another? When you imagine your ideal date and lovemaking session with yourself or a beloved, what qualities do you desire to have present? Which qualities do you find yourself most often and organically expressing?
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